


phases

by peachtones



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: (from kunhang), (it's only vaguely mentioned tho), Alternate Universe - College/University, Bad Flirting, Confessions, Emotional Constipation, Feelings, Friends With Benefits, Getting Together, House Party, M/M, Pining, all of the classics in this one such as:, and lots and lots of, there is an attempted blowjob, they're both dumb and in love ok
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-24
Updated: 2020-09-24
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:28:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26262691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peachtones/pseuds/peachtones
Summary: Unfortunately, an unexpected result ofactuallygetting to know Yukhei had arisen: he had developedfeelingsfor him, of the romantic variety.(or: kunhang is so, so fucked. but that's okay, because yukhei is too.)
Relationships: Wong Kun Hang | Hendery/Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas
Comments: 5
Kudos: 115





	phases

**Author's Note:**

> title is from the prettymuch song of the same name!

Kunhang, tucked into the corner of Ten’s kitchen on a chair he’d stolen from the island in the middle of the room, playing Animal Crossing on his phone and taking careful sips of his disgustingly awful beer (alcohol was alcohol, no matter how closely it resembled _actual piss_ in both color and taste. That, and he didn’t trust whatever “punch” concoction Ten had mixed for tonight, despite how delicious it smelled. The last time he’d indulged in Ten’s punch, he’d gotten blackout drunk and still wasn’t exactly sure how he’d ended up waking up on a beach _fifty miles_ away. Granted, the rest of his friends had been there too, everyone either curled up next to each other on blankets on the sand or passed out in Yangyang’s jeep -- the only good thing he’d gotten out of the experience was being able to watch a pretty spectacular sunrise. He didn’t really want to go down that road again so soon, if ever again), was intentionally ignoring the party going on around him. 

In all honesty, he didn’t really want to be there, but Yukhei had asked him to come with him. And when Yukhei had asked him, he’d used his puppy dog eyes, and well, Kunhang couldn’t resist Yukhei’s puppy dog eyes. (Yukhei was well aware of this fact and often used it for nefarious purposes.) That’s how Kunhang had ended up nursing a beer and trying to become one with Ten’s eccentric wallpaper while Yukhei was off doing god-knows-what in some other room of Ten’s ginormous house. Seriously, he had no idea how Ten afforded the rent for this place. 

Kunhang took another swig from his cup as he tapped at his phone screen and immediately grimaced as soon as he swallowed it. 

Without warning, a heavy weight dropped into Kunhang’s lap and a pair of arms haphazardly wrapped themselves around his shoulders. Some of the beer in his plastic cup sloshed over the lip and onto the floor as a result of Kunhang being jostled and his arm instinctively shot out to hold onto the waist of whoever had just seated themselves in his lap. He hadn’t even heard someone walk up to him, too focused on redecorating his camp for the tiny animals that lived in the digital campsite on his phone. 

He looked up just in time to catch Yukhei out of the corner of his eye as he pressed his plush lips against Kunhang’s cheek. Normally, he wouldn’t have minded getting a kiss from Yukhei, but there was a gross stickiness left on his cheek as the other pulled away that sent an unpleasant shiver down his spine.

He scowled up at a pink-cheeked and grinning Yukhei. He was clearly well past tipsy, if the rosy flush on his face and the way he just couldn’t stop smiling with that dopey grin on his face were any indication. Kunhang’s scowl immediately softened just ever-so-slightly. He couldn’t be mad at Yukhei with him looking like that, but he sure as hell could pretend he was. 

“Aw, don’t look at me like that,” Yukehi cooed, pinching Kunhang’s non-sticky cheek. 

“What was on your mouth and why is my cheek sticky now?” Kunhang asked, the question falling past his lips in the form of a tired sigh. He wasn’t really sure if he actually wanted to know the answer to his own question, but it was better off knowing than to _not_ knowing and letting his imagination run rampant.

“Lip gloss,” he immediately answered, like it was obvious. He made a show of smacking his lips together before puckering them in Kunhang’s direction, showing off what little remained of said lip gloss. “I was dancing with some really nice girls and one of them kissed me. I guess she had lip gloss on, so now I have lip gloss on.” He smacked his lips again, “y’know, like when someone’s chewing gum and you make out with them, and then suddenly _you’re_ chewing their gum.”

Kunhang made a face. “That’s gross.”

Yukhei just shrugged. “Not really, if you really think about it. Just like making out, but with a little _pizzazz_ , y’know?”

“No, I don’t.” Kunhang thought about someone else’s gum ending up in his mouth for a brief moment, and experienced a full body shudder because of said thought. “Still sounds absolutely disgusting.”

“C’mon, don’t knock it ‘til you try it.” He waggled his eyebrows at Kunhang. “I’ll even do it with you. Someone around here’s gotta have a piece of gum on them.” He listed backwards, looking back out into the crowd of people in the kitchen and just past the threshold into the living room like he was really gonna ask around for a piece of gum.

Kunhang tightened his arm around Yukhei’s waist. “I’m fine with never trying it, thank you very much.”

“Party pooper.” Yukhei childishly stuck his tongue out at Kunhang. “ _Oh_ ,” he said softly, mostly to himself as his eyes widened slightly, when he pulled his tongue back into his mouth, “I didn’t realize the lip gloss was flavored. I just thought she must’ve drank something fruity.”

Slightly curious about what the flavor could be since he couldn’t really smell it, Kunhang asked, “what flavor is it?”

Yukhei stuck his tongue back out, swiping it over his lower lip. Kunhang’s eyes unconsciously followed the action, watching the corners of Yukhei’s lips pull up into a smirk as a result. “Why don’t you come find out?”

(It should be stated, for the record, that in essence he and Yukhei were “friends with benefits”. 

Their unofficial arrangement had started at a party just like the one they were at now -- it might've even been one of Ten's parties, now that Kunhang thought about it -- with an attempted hook up that had ended with no actual hooking up whatsoever. They had both been drunk off their asses, unable to actually get themselves out of their clothes without getting stuck or tripping over themselves. Yukhei had actually gotten stuck in his sweatshirt and the two of them had struggled for five whole minutes to get him free, giggling until their stomachs hurt by the time he’d been released from his fabric prison. After the whole ordeal, they’d ended up just making out, sloppy and languid, and getting as close as they could to getting each other off without having to take their clothes off until they fell asleep and woke up tangled together with massive hangovers. 

After that night, they somehow kept finding each other at parties -- and later, on campus -- and mutually agreed to keep the little thing they’d started that night going. Most of the time they simply just made out with each other, either too busy or too tired to do anything more, but occasionally they gave into their more carnal desires and indulged in some groping and frottage, even going so far as a rushed handjob that Kunhang had been on the receiving end of, a few mutual masturbation sessions, and one instance of Yukhei offering to eat Kunhang out in the near future. (Kunhang’s face had turned the color of a tomato at the mere thought.) 

But the thing was, he had actually become pretty good friends with Yukhei. They started to hang out without the intention of hooking up (although, more often than not that’s where things ended up going) and had actually gotten to know him: he was half Thai, he had a Beagle back home named Bella, he could eat three bowls of instant Nuclear Fire Noodles in one sitting and suffer no ill-effects, _All Dogs Go To Heaven_ was one of his favorite movies, the list went on and on and on. He genuinely liked Yukhei for Yukhei, and considered him one of his best friends.

Unfortunately, an unexpected result of _actually_ getting to know Yukhei had arisen: he had developed _feelings_ for him, of the romantic variety. Not that Yukhei seemed to notice at all, mind you, but Kunhang had been trying very hard to keep all of his newfound feelings to himself. Maybe if he had realized what he was feeling for Yukhei earlier, he would’ve said something to him. But their hooking up had been going on for a while, and Yukhei was still going off and blatantly doing _things_ with other people (what _things_ he did, he never specified, but Kunhang was grateful for that) while he and Kunghang continued to fool around. But the two of them hadn’t agreed on anything, hadn’t set any boundaries for what they were doing -- he was in no position to demand Yukhei stop what he was doing, just because he didn’t like it. If they were just keeping it casual, he could do casual.

When he had drunkenly complained about this particularly topic to his roommate, Dejun, about it, Dejun proceeded to call him stupid and smack him upside the head with his pillow. An ensuing pillow fight and a little roughhousing that ended up with them both sprawled out on the floor between their beds resulted in Dejun turning his head to look at Kunhang and sincerely telling him, _Kunhang, in the seven months I’ve known you, I have never seen you do anything_ casually. _You can’t do casual no matter how hard you try. You’re too far gone for this guy, so just tell him how you feel. He might even --_ shockingly! -- _return some, of all, of your feelings!_

But what did Dejun know? Absolutely nothing, about his feelings or what feelings Yukhei might have for him. Maybe he should take his own advice and actually talk to his Chemistry lab partner instead of just pining over him until the semester ends! (Kunhang told him as much and Dejun tried to smother him while shouting _that’s different!_ ))

Kunhang rolled his eyes, pushing himself as far back in his chair as he could while he was being held captive by Yukhei, not realizing he'd unconsciously leaned into Yukhei’s personal space as they talked. “Did you get that line from one of Jungwoo’s dramatic fanfiction readings that he forces you to attend?”

Yukhei ignored him and frowned, but it looked more like a pout on his lips. Kunhang fought off the sudden desire to pinch his cheek and coo at him. 

“ _Kuuuunhaaangggggg,_ ” Yukhei whined, wrapping his arms tighter around Kunhang’s shoulders and rocking him from side to side a little. “Please?” 

He even puckered his lips, turning his head to point them in Kunhang’s direction. Kunhang resisted the urge to roll his eyes again. Yukhei always did this with him -- say something that would hint at the fact that he wanted something from him (usually a kiss) and then wait for him to cave and give it to him. If he didn’t, Yukhei would pester him until he did, even go as far as literally laying on top of him and whining until his demands were met. (And they were, 99% of the time. Kunhang did not have enough willpower to deny Yukhei.)

Almost petulantly, Kunhang said, “you interrupted my game of Animal Crossing and spilled my drink. Why would I want to give you a kiss?”

The puckered lips turned back into a pout. Then suddenly, he was moving, trying to swing his legs around so he could straddle Kunhang. He successfully completed his objective and looped his arms around Kunhang’s neck, but not without nearly giving Kunhang a heart attack, quickly grabbing tightly onto Yukhei’s sweatshirt as he did so he didn’t fall off his lap and crack his head open on the floor. Kunhang gave the giant golden retriever personified in his lap a withering look when he had resituated himself.

“ _Kunhang_ ,” Yukhei continued to whine, ignoring the look he was being given to lean in until he was nose-to-nose with Kunhang. “C’mon,” he pressed another kiss to the cheek he’d kissed earlier, “just,” he moved to the other cheek, “ _one_ ,” he moved to his jaw, “kiss,” and down to his neck. 

Kunhang squirmed under Yukhei at the lingering sticky feeling being left by each kiss. “ _Fine_ ,” he sighed, leaning towards the nearest flat surface so he could set his cup of beer down (which Yukhei took out of his hand and set on said flat surface for him when his reach came up just a little too short) before he wrapped his arms around the Yukhei’s waist. He puckered his lips and looked up at Yukhei, the cue for Yukhei to come and get his kiss. He parted his lips as soon as Yukehi’s brushed up against his, tongue darting out. (The lip gloss was strawberry flavored.)

Several minutes and a rather long “one kiss” later they broke for air, a string of saliva clinging to the corner of their lips, connecting their mouths. Kunhang grimaced as the strand broke and Yukhei wiped the spit off of the corner of Kunhang’s mouth with his thumb, grinning like a idiot. 

“ _Shut up,_ ” Kunhang said.

“I didn’t say anything,”

“No, but your face did.” 

Yukhei scrunched up his face to rid it of any expression, and then unscrunched it. “Better?”

Through a laugh, Kunhang said, “ _sure_.”

“You know what I’ve been thinking about a lot lately?” Yukhei asked suddenly, absently rubbing random shapes into the nape of Kunhang’s neck with his other hand.

“What?” Kunhang mused. “What have you been thinking about a lot lately?” 

Yukhei leaned slightly closer to Kunhang, his voice dropping an octave as he said, "I want to suck your dick."

Kunhang nearly got whiplash. If he had been taking a drink, he surely would’ve choked. " _Yukhei_ ," he hissed.

"What? It's a nice dick,” he whined. “I've had it in my hand, and now I want it in my mouth."

Kunhang fought the urge to cover Yukhei’s mouth with his hand, knowing the other would simply cover his palm in saliva (in the unsexy way) until Kunhang removed his hand and he regained the liberty of free speech. “ _Yukhei, you can’t just say that!_ ” he whispered aggressively.

“What, it’s true! I wouldn't lie about that kind of thing!” he argued, completely missing Kunhang’s point. “You’ve got a nice dick and I would very much like to blow you! I thought about it earlier and haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since.” His tongue involuntarily darted out, wetting his lips where the lip gloss had been rubbed off (read: smeared all over Kunhang’s mouth). “Kunhang, will you let me give you a blowjob?”

Kunhang just blinked at him, several times, in rapid succession.

Yukhei shifted slightly in Kunhang’s lap, wrapping his arms tighter around his neck and leaning forwards so his lips just barely brushed against the shell of Kunhang’s ear as he pleaded, “Kunhang, _please_ let me blow you.”

Kunhang’s body shivered at the barely-there drag of Yukhei’s lips against his ear. Almost dumbly, he asked, “ _right here?_ ”

Yukhei huffed out a breath that tickled Kunhang’s neck, slightly offended. “I have _some_ sense of decency,” he said. “I’d blow you in the bathroom, up against the door. How does that sound?” 

Kunhang paused, biting his lip.

Yukhei never pushed Kunhang to do anything he wasn’t comfortable with or simply did not want to do. Simply put, Yukhei always made sure he had explicit agreement from Kunhang no matter what they did, even if it was something as innocent as kissing. Even during exam season, which had made them more stressed than usual and pushed them past their usual making out and heavy petting into frottage and actually seeing each other naked, rather than just in partial states of undress territory. They had actually almost fucked, Yukhei about ready to put his fingers up Kunhang’s ass to prep him when Dejun had entered his room, not paying attention to bowtie tied around his door handle and just started rambling on about some shit one of his professors had pulled in class that day before he noticed that Yukhei was there, shirtless and fingers coated in lube, and Kunhang was naked from the waist down, his ass propped up on a pillow. He had flushed a deep crimson before backtracking immediately, fleeing the scene and ever so generously closing the door behind him. (Sadly, Dejun interrupting them had totally killed the mood.) 

The problem was: it had been a while since they had last seen each other, neither of their schedules lining up, which had given Kunhang time to stew on the feelings he was experiencing and come to terms with them with the help of Dejun, which simply boiled down to _holy shit I think I_ like _like him. Like, maybe I’m in love with him? But_ love _was a strong word--_

Okay, it wasn’t like he didn’t _not_ want a blowjob from Yukhei (he really, _really_ did), it was that he may say something particularly incriminating while in the throes of pleasure that he couldn’t just casually play off later, for fear Yukhei might break off their arrangement due to what he had said. They had agreed on casual, no strings attached. Potentially accidentally declaring your love for your fuck buddy while getting (most likely) some of the best head of your life was not very _keeping things casual._

Yukhei immediately took note of Kunhang’s hesitancy, sitting back and pulling one of his arms back so he could cradle Kunhang’s face, gently stroking his cheek with his thumb. Kunhang unconsciously leaned into his touch.

“Remember, you can say no,” he assured, searching Kunhang’s face for any traces of unease in his features.

“No, no,” Kunhang said quickly, before backtracking, “wait, _ugh,_ I meant no, _yes,_ it’s fine. You can…” He vaguely gestured with his hand, hoping the motion conveyed what he meant to say.

“...blow you?” Yukhei finished for him. Kunhang nodded and Yukhei grinned. “We should find that bathroom then, huh?”

As promised, Yukhei had Kunhang crowded up against the back of the door to the bathroom, his mouth attached to Kunhang’s, refusing to part from the other’s lips as his fingers fumbled with the lock on the door like he’d die as if he so much as stopped kissing him for a mere second. Sighing into Yukhei’s mouth, Kunhang slid his hand along the door until he found the door handle, batting Yukhei’s hand away and locking it himself. 

With the door locked, Yukhei finally separated his lips from Kunhang’s, moving them down to mouth at Kunhang’s jaw and neck. Kunhang’s eyes slid shut, his head dropping back against the door with a dull _thunk,_ giving the other greater access to his neck. Yukhei took the opportunity to kiss at the newly exposed skin a bit before pulling back, dropping a kiss on Kunhang’s lips before he dropped to his knees. He rested his hands on Kunhang’s thighs to steady himself as he found a comfortable position to kneel in before his hands slid upwards, fingers deftly working to unbutton and unzip Kunhang’s pants.

Kunhang braved a look down at Yukhei, and suddenly it felt like someone had squeezed all the air out of his lungs. The thoughts from earlier -- that he was dispensable to Yukhei, that there was someone ready to replace him as soon as Yukhei decided he didn’t want to fool around with him anymore -- reared its ugly head, leaving him feeling uncomfortably and overwhelmingly warm, topped with the fact that he had feelings for Yukhei that he didn’t likely return. One of his hands shakily grabbed onto Yukhei’s shoulder, fingers twisting into the fabric. “Yukhei, I-- stop. Stop, _stop_.”

At his words Yukhei immediately stopped, his hands moving from where they’d been about ready to tug Kunhang’s pants down to hold the backs of his thighs, before sliding down to rest just above the backs of Kunhang’s knees. Kunhang’s free hand shot up to cover his face, the other still buried in the shoulder of Yukhei’s hoodie.

“Kunhang?” Yukhei asked gently. Kunhang didn’t answer, so he tried again. “Kunhang, are you alright?”

“It’s just-- I’m--” he tried to start, voice muffled behind his hand. 

He didn’t even know what he was trying to say, thoughts all jumbled as his emotions were running high (curse all that beer from earlier). He wanted to tell Yukhei how he felt, to just get it over with and stop feeling like this when Yukhei rejected him. He didn’t want to do it like this, though. He _couldn’t_ confess like this: tipsy and about to get a blowjob in Ten’s bathroom. But if he didn’t say something now, he felt like he was going to explode. Or throw up. Maybe both.

Yukhei squeezed the back of Kunhang’s thigh, probably meant to be reassuring. “If this is about the blowjob, you know a yes is a yes until it’s a no. We can stop and forget this even happened if you’re uncomfortable or just don’t want me to to blow you anymore for whatever reason, I won’t be upset or mad or anything.”

“I know,” Kunhang said, still clinging to Yukhei’s shirt. Even though his voice was still muffled by his hand, Yukhei could hear the way his tone had taken on a watery tinge.

Instantly he was on his feet, gingerly taking hold of Kunhang’s elbow. Beneath Kunhang’s hand, there was a sniff -- Kunhang was crying. Yukhei could see the way his lip wobbled where it was partially exposed beneath his palm.

“No,” Yukhei murmured softly, “ _baby,_ why are you crying?”

Ah, the pet name -- Kunhang’s Achilles’ heel. Fully formed tears started to well up in his eyes and curled into himself as he sucked in a breath. Yukhei gently pulled on Kunahng’s elbow, pulling his hand away from his face and wrapping his arms around him, pulling Kunhang into him. Kunhang buried his face into Yukhei’s shoulder and let out a heaving sob. Yukhei’s hand was already on Kunhang’s back, rubbing soothing circles into the fabric of his shirt.

“ _I don’t want to_ ,” Kunhang mumbled into Yukhei’s shoulder when he finally regained the ability to speak.

“What?” 

Kunhang lifted his head from Yukhei’s shoulder, tears still sliding down his cheeks. “I don’t want to forget this ever happened. I want to remember, and keep remembering.” His lip wobbled. “I like you, Wong Yukhei. Like, a lot.” He buried his head back into Yukhei’s shoulder, “an embarrassing amount. That’s why I’m crying, because I like you so much.” 

Yukhei ran his hand down Kunhang’s back. “I know.”

 _He knew. He knew you had feelings for him._ “Oh.” Kunhang sniffed. _He knew all this time and this is him rejecting you--_

“I mean, I’ve known for a while, I think. You’re really bad about hiding how you feel, Kunhang, it’s literally written all over your face. When you think food tastes bad, when you’re trying to act like you weren’t scared, _when you like someone_.” Kunhang stayed still in Yukhei’s arms, not knowing what to say. “But you’re also kinda dense. I didn’t know someone so smart could be that dense, and not realize that I have had the _biggest_ crush on you since our freshman Eng Comp class together.”

Kunhang’s head slowly lifted, lingering tears making his eyelashes cling together. “What?”

Yukhei brought his hand up to cup Kunhang’s cheek, wiping away the tear track with his thumb. “I like you too, Kunhang." _Yukhei liked him back._ "I was just trying to let you figure yourself out a bit before I said anything. I didn't want to scare you off with feelings and commitment if you thought we were just fooling around."

Kunhang’s lip began to wobble again. "You liked me the whole time and didn't tell me! I've been making a fool out of myself this whole time!" he wailed, burying his face back into Yukhei's shoulder as he sniffled, before his head shot back up. "What about the lip gloss! You said you kissed a girl earlier!"

"There was no girl." He paused. "Well, there _was_ a girl, but it was Yuqi insisting Soojin put some of her lip gloss on me. Also, I kinda wanted to see if you could get jealous," he admitted. "I haven’t been with anyone else since we started doing what we’ve been doing.” 

“ _But I thought--_ ”

Yukhei shook his head, a smile on his lips. “Nope. You're my one and only, Wong Kunhang."

“ _What the fuck,_ ” Kunhang whispered. He really played himself, huh.

“And now that we’ve established that we both like each other, I can finally ask you this: Kunhang, would you like to be my boyfriend?”

“Do you really need me to answer that?” Kunhang asked. He felt drained after that emotional rollercoaster, and all he really wanted to do now was take a nap. Preferably, while cuddling with Yukhei. “You know exactly how I feel about you. I just cried over you.”

“Not really, but I wanted to hear you say it.”

Kunhang sighed. “Yes, Yukhei, I would love to be your boyfriend.”

Yukhei’s face lit up. “Good.” And then he was pulling Kunhang in for a kiss, both of them smiling into it.

After they had separated, Yukhei asked after a short pause, “so, no head?”

Kunhang hit him on the chest. "Shut the fuck up and kiss me again."

**Author's Note:**

> dejun's chemistry lab partner is jeno bc i live in rarepair hell :-)
> 
> \+ [twitter](https://twitter.com/peachfreezy)  
> \+ [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.qa/peachtones)


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